It is Mine

There it sits…

right in front of me.

I know what it is–I have seen it before.

I know whose it is–it declares its owner like some haughty personalized plate.

There it sits…

The fruit of my prayers…the wakeful nights spent praying for conviction.  The early mornings tirelessly imploring for a confession.  The sentinel preoccupation of waiting for a sign of repentance.

And now there it sits…

All mine to claim.

Like so many times before, I’ve slipped and fallen back into sin.

I’ve cluttered my thoughts with libraries of judgment.

I’ve crowded my heart with hate, depositing offenses like a frenzied shopper collecting bargains at a clearance sale.

I’ve worn another’s weakness as my own folly.

Like so many times before, I alone stand guilty.

Next to my guilt, sits another truth…

the basin containing the water of forgiveness.

The cut of conviction has been bathed in its mercies before.

Each dip into its warmth and comfort soothes my grief and awakens my poisoned thoughts and heart to live again the life they have been called to live.

There it sits…

My forgiveness.  It is mine.

“Purify me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.  Make me to hear joy and gladness., let the bones which You have broken rejoice…Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me…Restore to me the joy of Your salvation and sustain with a willing spirit…Then my tongue will joyfully sing of Your righteousness.  O Lord, open my lips, that my tongue may declare your praise”  Psalm 51:7-15.

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