“Most come here over someone’s objections…Some of you are living over someone’s objections as you struggle to find your God-given identity and your place in His kingdom work.”
These words spoken today by Dr. Richard Mouw penetrated my heart in a profound way and with no warning the tears poured from the deep rivers my heart had dammed up for years.
I have thought about, dreamed about, prayed about, yes…even avoided, Seminary for at least 15 years. But today it became a reality. With it came exhilaration, expectation…and fear.
What Dr. Mouw articulated is the tension I live with every day. I possess a desperate desire to be equipped and empowered for ministry. However, like a scarlet letter, the little letter ‘f’ for ‘female’ must always be checked on every inventory I have ever considered for the place I hope to play in God’s kingdom work. I am painfully aware that to be who I believe God has called me to be requires I “live over the objections of others.”
I hate that I believe the lies about gender limitations more than I trust the truth that God has spoken to my heart. I hate that I care more about what others will say about me than treasuring God’s approval. I hate that to walk the pastures He has promised to lead me through will probably mean that I will be required to walk through the valley of shadows experienced by misunderstandings, ended relationships and loss. All things I hate; things that keep me up at night; things I fear more than anything else.
Today my heart consented to what my head already knew and tonight they are consoling each other with the truth that living to God’s approval is better than never doing anything bold enough of which others could object.
What are you not doing because you are afraid of others objections?