Stepping Into It {Life Unmasked}

I was going to write my Life Unmasked entry today on how I didn’t want to get out of bed. Because I didn’t, I wanted to just lay in the warm and cozy place all.day.long.

But the dog whined and I, like a fool, thought this was a sign from heaven that instead of writing about laying in bed all day, I should get up. Wake up to life. Let the dogs out. Do something to remind me of my worth and value.

That plan worked out splendidly until I let the dog back inside.

The dog with hemisphere-sized paws had stepped in fresh crap and paraded it about the house. CRAP! I should have stayed in bed.

These are the guilty crap-laden paws of Percy Basset.

And that crap-laden paw pretty much sums up how I feel about life this morning.

Seems freshly stepped-in crap keeps parading through my life.

Early mornings are calibrating times for me. I read. I pray. My identity is dressed modestly in truth. When I’m lying in bed truth seems like it has such wide-open opportunity to be found in the reality of my life.

But then the moment of action comes. The leg dangles over the bed. The cold air meets it with a cheer to “Go! Fight! Win!” And squish…I plant myself right in crap.

Crap looks like forgetting to call my mom on the day she started radiation and her feelings are hurt because when you forget to call, others think you don’t care. In reality, you just hate cancer and sometimes it is easier to ignore the things you hate than to face the pain of someone you love.

It looks like missing a friend but being unwilling to reach out to them with an honest conversation about it because frankly you just don’t trust them and it makes everything feel awkward and strained and when you know you’re going to have to see them, you think about how to make it as short as possible and you get mad at yourself for increasing the fake quotient with every encounter. Nothing smells more like fresh crap than becoming the very thing you don’t trust.

Crap is writing a blog post you think will be encouraging but it sucks the life out of someone and hurts them and you feel nothing but guilt about parading your crap around their life and you think you should probably stop writing and while you’re at it start practicing the discipline of silence.

I’m just always stepping into crap. It stinks.

And I wonder if life—living as a person of value and worth, for the glory of Another—is just going to ever add up to more than stepping in crap, cleaning it up, repeat.  Cheerful, huh? Well, this is me, unmasked. You can judge, but I’ll bet that you’ve stepped into some crap of your own. In which case, don’t feel so alone. The reality is that there is a lot of crap out there. We are the people who step into it. And by God’s grace, we clean it up.

“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death {and step in its crap}, I fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff they, comfort me {and help me get things cleaned up}.” ~Psalm 23:4

Today I’m linking up with Joy in This Journey’s Life Unmasked…because we could all use a little more honesty. Take a visit there for more Life Unmasked stories…or add your own.

6 thoughts on “Stepping Into It {Life Unmasked}

  1. I really couldn’t have said it better myself. Of course, I thought I was alone in it. Thank you for making me realize I am not

    • Amber, Oh no way are you alone! We just don’t talk about the struggles of everyday life enough. We’re all pressing in…and yes, you are in very good company.

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