No Filter Friday {Goodbyes, Living our Dreams, and Saying What Needs to Be Said}

Home. I’m finally home. Where coffee gets delivered bedside. The trip up north was all in all, nice. It was a sweet time with The Boy. Wait. Moving is never sweet and it’s No Filter Friday so why I am trying to shoe shine this? Old habits die hard. So, the moving part of the trip was not quite a nightmare, but it might have made for good reality t.v.

The Boy’s new house that he will share with seven other boys is sure to hold many adventures for him. The least not being that he discovered on move in day that his room…in the basement…has no heat. Don’t shrug that off, California beach people. This is a basement in Washington, two states closer to the North Pole. He’s likely to need wipers to clear a path for his breath. Well, hardship builds character. I’m just hoping hypothermia doesn’t claim any fingers or toes.

Saying goodbye to him was sweet…and like my heart tried to vacate my chest. I mused that goodbyes must be one of the hardest things that image-bearers do. The steadfast, never-forsaking, “I-am-with-you” God is all about the ‘hello’ of life and I have a hunch that as we bear his image, goodbyes are supposed to hurt just a little. That sounds a whole lot better than admitting that I am an emotional pansy. Wah, wah, wah.

Speaking of wah, wah, wah–so long tax-free Amazon shopping. Oh that is so depressing!

On a not so depressing note. While in Seattle I had the chance to sneak a lunch with a friend from high school. Our best guess is that we hadn’t actually seen each other in about twenty years {hangs head in shame}. It was great to hear about her life, family, and what God is doing in her. It’s so cool to see someone live into the dreams of their youth. The really weird thing about our time together is that it instantly transformed me back into my high school self…really, I left feeling so incredibly much younger. It was like happening upon a youth serum.

Fall television is back into full swing and I’m completely swept up by The Voice and The X-Factor. I only wish Christina would put away her boobs and that Britney would smile. I don’t know if you watched the X-Factor last night, but that 13-year-old was amazing. People amaze me with their talents. I wish we all had more confidence in sharing them and that we had more grace to accept and treasure them from one another…fear, pride, jealously, and all those ugly things of life seem too often to get in the way. But as someone whose capacity for ‘talent’ is limited to mediocre, I want you uber talented people to shine. You make life interesting.

I just finished reading How Georgia Became O’Keefe: Lessons on the Art of Living. Super inspiring. Three things: 1) I’m so thankful I was not a woman at the turn of the century. 2) Georgia’s life demonstrates the value of being exactly who you are, no more, no less. I loved her refusal to conform to all the silly, shallow conventions. 3) Resiliency. We all need more of it if we are going to live out our dreams.

I’m looking forward to the weekend. Tonight I have ladies gathering ’round the table for dinner. Lunch tomorrow with a friend I haven’t seen in a few months. Sunday is church. {That’s a stupidly, theologically incorrect sentence…Sunday I will join for worship with the church.} These things are making it bearable that today I will be cleaning my house. Have I ever mentioned here how much I hate cleaning the house? Don’t get me wrong: I love a clean house…I just want someone else to do it for me. It always ruins the manicure, for all my muscle power my house never glistens like the cleaning products promise, and things never stays clean long enough.

One last thing before I go…talk, people! This week I had so many emails, texts, phone calls that included the line: “I don’t want to talk about it.” Okay. I know some things are hard to talk about and hard to talk through, but stuffing it or denying it is about as effective as keeping a house clean while owning four dogs. I get that there is vulnerability in putting voice to our emotions, but we humans are the only ones with intelligent speech…we should steward it well. I think this tendency to hold back from sharing the true stuff about ourselves goes in two directions: 1) Fear: If I talk, others will judge me and potentially reject me. 2) Responsibility: Not enough of us are being the kind of people who are safe to talk to. I suspect that everyone reading this can take a step in one of those two directions. If you’re stuffing words or afraid to reach out for help, celebrate the freedom of Friday and get that stuff off your chest. Find a safe person and share away. And if someone calls you to talk–listen well. Make space in the conversation for God to be God…and don’t forget for even a second that you aren’t him. Remember how hard it is when you’re on the other end. Let them fumble with their words. Be okay with silence. And for heaven’s sake–don’t do their talking for them. Keep their story safe.

Enjoy your weekend, friends. If you’re in SoCal, stay cool, cats…looks like our heatwave continues. So much for soup for dinner.

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